My Deep, Dark Secrets

I’m pretty open about everything. By that I mean, I tell everything to anyone that’ll listen. But there are some things that don’t naturally come up..and a few I intentionally hold back. Anyway, I bet you didn’t know that…

If you let me, I would play The Sims™ all day, everyday. I don’t even have it downloaded on my laptop because it’s too dangerous. Okay, that’s a secret-lite, but…

I’m really, really bad about taking my birth control everyday. I never let this on to anybody, but it’s sort of ridiculous how blasé I am about this. I’ve only had one scare that lasted like 2 weeks, but, of course, I never told anyone, so my irresponsibility has been my own problem ’til now. Luckily I’m forever alone, so it not that big of a deal.

I love wearing my hair out and natural, but I’m terrified that other people think it looks stupid. So it’s usually pulled back.

I bite my nails down to the cuticle and then I bite my cuticles ’til they bleed. Yeah, “eww” is right. I think it’s a symptom of my anxiety. This next one is a biggie…

I go number 2 the RIGHT way…you know, the way the entire non-western world goes? The way that’s healthier and easier on our bodies? Who’s the crazy one? Me? Or you and your “civilized throne-sitting?”

On a lighter note, I love showtunes.

Finally, I can totally imagine having a penis. Maybe I was a man in a past life, but I think I know exactly what it would be like. I’m jealous. In my head, if I had a penis, I would masturbate every time I had 60 seconds alone.

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